As the journey of motherhood continues to unfold, I find myself reflecting on the past year — a transformative chapter marked by both growth and grace. Resuming my software job in Jan last year after a six-month maternity break, my little one is now 17 months old, and I have a few honest confessions to make! Here’s my take on ‘what they say’ vs ‘reality’:
1. ‘Main apni favourite hoon’ is no longer true! I have a new little bae (before anyone else) as my favourite human now. For those who can’t relate, this is a famous dialogue by Kareena Kapoor’s iconic character Geet in the Bollywood movie ‘Jab We Met’ which translates to ‘I am my favourite/ I love myself the most’. I am surprised that it comes so naturally.
2. No one WANTS you as much as the baby. The baby needs you and wants you at the same time which would no longer be the case as years pass by. So, just LIVE these moments while you have them because I am sure until you became a mom, you wouldn’t have experienced the want and need at the same time from another human.
3. You experience LOVE in its true sense. The one in any other relationship is not the same! No matter how much you say that you love another adult but there are expectations and under the line it’s a give and take relationship. There is a blissful feeling in being a mom, at least the initial few years I believe.
4. Working mom as a concept is chaotic! I have a huge respect for women who decided to quit their jobs and also the ones who continue to work, it’s just a choice and nothing beyond that. No one has it figured out yet, everyone is just trying to make a balance. I am still learning to balance the chaos both physically and mentally, it’s going to be a long journey I believe.
5. Packing your bag for a trip is no longer the same. Most of the space in the bag would be taken up by the diapers and other baby stuff. Meh, I don’t get to carry 10 outfits for a three-day trip now, there is space for only three now! It’s time to go minimal and compact in your packing now.
6. The expectations conundrum: Ah! You can’t beat this one between you and your spouse. As a mother, you have the baby as your new priority which feels different to your spouse 100% (just to put it out in the most subtle words). Brace yourself — the disagreements are real. Contrary to what people say, having a baby doesn’t magically fix everything. This is a story that echoes in every household.
7. Nothing can beat the joy when you see the first smile and when you hear the first ‘Mumma’/‘Papa’. And, also all the other firsts. The feeling is truly surreal. But let’s be honest — it doesn’t come without its challenges. Parenthood is a 24/7 commitment, and alongside the heart-melting moments, there are just as many instances of exhaustion and frustration.
8. There is negligible time for yourself, no ‘me time’ to put it out straight. I honestly miss the carefree outings. Now, you need to consider multiple parameters before you step out of the house with or without the baby. It’s important that you build a support system with extended family for you to be able to step out.
9. It’s true when they say, ‘It’s hard to leave your baby behind’. Leaving your baby behind and going to work every day is easier said than done. Kudos to all the women who do this every day. It’s just the trust in your head which makes it work. When you leave the baby behind, your mind is constantly thinking about the baby.
10. This is a funny one from this morning itself, I never peeled a pomegranate until it was for my bae! It’s such a tedious and time-consuming fruit, ah. Once you become a mother, you will find yourself doing so much more than you ever did.
You truly can’t beat the newfound respect for your own parents — and the moment you realise why they always said, “You’ll understand when you’re a parent!”
Another honest one: there are times you think, “Where am I stuck between adulting and parenthood? I just want those carefree days back!” But truthfully, like I’ve said — age isn’t just a number. It’s about evolving roles and growing responsibilities.
So continue to live, love, laugh — with the baby now!
Becoming a new mother is an emotional rollercoaster — raw, tender, and transformative — where exhaustion and joy coexist, and every day reshapes who you are.
Narang is a technology leader at Red Hat, balancing her role as an engineering manager with motherhood
1. ‘Main apni favourite hoon’ is no longer true! I have a new little bae (before anyone else) as my favourite human now. For those who can’t relate, this is a famous dialogue by Kareena Kapoor’s iconic character Geet in the Bollywood movie ‘Jab We Met’ which translates to ‘I am my favourite/ I love myself the most’. I am surprised that it comes so naturally.
2. No one WANTS you as much as the baby. The baby needs you and wants you at the same time which would no longer be the case as years pass by. So, just LIVE these moments while you have them because I am sure until you became a mom, you wouldn’t have experienced the want and need at the same time from another human.
3. You experience LOVE in its true sense. The one in any other relationship is not the same! No matter how much you say that you love another adult but there are expectations and under the line it’s a give and take relationship. There is a blissful feeling in being a mom, at least the initial few years I believe.
4. Working mom as a concept is chaotic! I have a huge respect for women who decided to quit their jobs and also the ones who continue to work, it’s just a choice and nothing beyond that. No one has it figured out yet, everyone is just trying to make a balance. I am still learning to balance the chaos both physically and mentally, it’s going to be a long journey I believe.
5. Packing your bag for a trip is no longer the same. Most of the space in the bag would be taken up by the diapers and other baby stuff. Meh, I don’t get to carry 10 outfits for a three-day trip now, there is space for only three now! It’s time to go minimal and compact in your packing now.
6. The expectations conundrum: Ah! You can’t beat this one between you and your spouse. As a mother, you have the baby as your new priority which feels different to your spouse 100% (just to put it out in the most subtle words). Brace yourself — the disagreements are real. Contrary to what people say, having a baby doesn’t magically fix everything. This is a story that echoes in every household.
7. Nothing can beat the joy when you see the first smile and when you hear the first ‘Mumma’/‘Papa’. And, also all the other firsts. The feeling is truly surreal. But let’s be honest — it doesn’t come without its challenges. Parenthood is a 24/7 commitment, and alongside the heart-melting moments, there are just as many instances of exhaustion and frustration.
8. There is negligible time for yourself, no ‘me time’ to put it out straight. I honestly miss the carefree outings. Now, you need to consider multiple parameters before you step out of the house with or without the baby. It’s important that you build a support system with extended family for you to be able to step out.
9. It’s true when they say, ‘It’s hard to leave your baby behind’. Leaving your baby behind and going to work every day is easier said than done. Kudos to all the women who do this every day. It’s just the trust in your head which makes it work. When you leave the baby behind, your mind is constantly thinking about the baby.
10. This is a funny one from this morning itself, I never peeled a pomegranate until it was for my bae! It’s such a tedious and time-consuming fruit, ah. Once you become a mother, you will find yourself doing so much more than you ever did.
You truly can’t beat the newfound respect for your own parents — and the moment you realise why they always said, “You’ll understand when you’re a parent!”
Another honest one: there are times you think, “Where am I stuck between adulting and parenthood? I just want those carefree days back!” But truthfully, like I’ve said — age isn’t just a number. It’s about evolving roles and growing responsibilities.
So continue to live, love, laugh — with the baby now!
Becoming a new mother is an emotional rollercoaster — raw, tender, and transformative — where exhaustion and joy coexist, and every day reshapes who you are.
Narang is a technology leader at Red Hat, balancing her role as an engineering manager with motherhood
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